Are you real? Really, are you authentic?
We are often told to “fake it until you make it”. That is bad advice. People can smell a “fake” a mile away. What endears people to one another, what opens the heart is authenticity. We want to interact with real people, not a “made up” version or a facade.
Have you ever been with a person who is very comfortable in their own skin, content with who they are. When there is authenticity, there is openness and a connection that exists, rarely experienced with others. Have you ever listened to someone who “pours their heart out…warts an all”? Don’t you feel a greater connection with them compared to someone who comes across perfectly polished?
What often happens when we look at ourselves in the mirror is we don’t like what we see and we begin to layer on a facade or false-self. The problem with that is we devalue our real-self in the process and we begin to lose touch with who we really are. When we aren’t real, people sense it at a deeper level and we call up their own protective shell, often referred to the Ego. When we are authentic, we give others the permission to be authentic as well.
Now, if you have serious character flaws or an abrasive personality, I don’t suggest you “let it all hang out” if favor of being real. It would be advisable for you go to work on yourself with the support of a coach or mentor to help smooth out the rough edges toward refinement. Let your best authentic-self show up but be willing to allow others to see your flaws and imperfections. That is called being human. I would rather be with a flawed human (really, we all are) than with a superficially flawless individual.
My challenge to you is to take some risks and let your guard down. Let your true authentic self out into the open. If someone does not like how you are showing up, who cares! It’s their problem, not yours. A person’s judgment is more about their need to judge than who you are being. As you become more authentic, you may experience the following:
– More inner-peace as you don’t have to keep worrying about your “mask”.
– Greater connection with others at a deeper level.
– More committed business relationships.
– Deeper inter-personal ties with those you love.
When you live with authenticity, you are living from your heart.